At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
