I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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