Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Randomize
