Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize