You work out of a Hotel?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
