i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
