Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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