I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize