love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
i think i just lost a toe
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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