i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize