i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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