Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Also, beer. Big fan.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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