I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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