It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
