Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
