AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You have to summon your inner elephant
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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