u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
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Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
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Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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