Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?

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  (502): It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it? http://tfl.nu/bh2w
  Replies (13) Good night (514) Bad night (4254)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker

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  (920): its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker http://tfl.nu/gudl
  Replies (11) Good night (1661) Bad night (3374)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.

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  (804): Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009. http://tfl.nu/yk6t
  Replies (49) Good night (5625) Bad night (1270)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.

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  (401): What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy. http://tfl.nu/6xxv
  Replies (25) Good night (8362) Bad night (1041)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed

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  (713): when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed http://tfl.nu/1ijl
  Replies (13) Good night (5161) Bad night (1278)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.

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  (480): He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now. http://tfl.nu/isy9
  Replies (12) Good night (3802) Bad night (1393)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis

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  (518): Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis http://tfl.nu/kplw
  Replies (18) Good night (7074) Bad night (1154)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?

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  (662): Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened? http://tfl.nu/nd5l
  Replies (6) Good night (3073) Bad night (1087)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.

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  (410): I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you. http://tfl.nu/qo8n
  Replies (24) Good night (4059) Bad night (1188)
• Favorite

  (567): View more from Ohio

  For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.

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  (567): For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts. http://tfl.nu/swyw
  Replies (10) Good night (1962) Bad night (814)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?

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  (901): I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter? http://tfl.nu/wyo3
  Replies (6) Good night (1481) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.

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  (734): I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW. http://tfl.nu/ynr9
  Replies (10) Good night (2449) Bad night (477)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.

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  (678): It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes. http://tfl.nu/rtfu
  Replies (3) Good night (1179) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town

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  (905): To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town http://tfl.nu/jicp
  Replies (3) Good night (499) Bad night (346)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs

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  (972): Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs http://tfl.nu/f6lr
  Replies (6) Good night (412) Bad night (217)

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