Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
