No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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