But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize