call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True strength comes from lack of pants
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He did a backflip because drugs
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize