Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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