So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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