On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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