I got chris browned last night
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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