We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
