Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize