i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize