So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I did not marry a roomba.
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