I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
