I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize