No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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