I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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