you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize