I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
