It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
