look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
