you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
whose ass print is on the piano?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
