he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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