Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
