His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
