I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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