If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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