just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
