For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
