Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize