My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize