I am puke
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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