I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize