Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Say something about gay babies.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Randomize
